A while back, a friend and I were leaving my house to go hiking with our dogs. I was taking one dog and leaving the other behind. At the door I said to the dog who had to stay home, "Stay here." My friend said, "I can't believe you just said that! Did you hear yourself? STAY HERE! That's so DUMB."

Let me explain. Both of us train for competitive obedience. Both of us spend a lot of time attuning our dogs to words, and all the commands have specific meanings. STAY means just that - don't move a muscle. HERE means "get over to me right this second." So what I had just told my dog was to plant it till I released her but to get her little doggy body over to me immediately. What I really meant to tell her was "wait." So, if my dog then begins to falter on both Stay and Here, whose fault is it? Not the dog's.

But that's an accident of language. Not all dogs are trained quite so finely. However, we all train our dogs to do stupid things inadvertently. Why? Because we don't realize we ARE training them. To most people, training a dog means putting on a leash, grabbing some treats, going somewhere quiet, and teaching the dog things like sit, stay, down, come, heel, etc. But because dogs are very intelligent and watch us constantly, and listen to even our mistakes, we are training them all the time. Just like kids, dogs are always looking to us for guidance. Some more examples of how NOT to train, even when you think you're not training.

Company comes and your dog is being annoying. You want the dog to lie down and be quiet. So you look at your dog and say, "Down." The dog ignores you. "Down. . . .down. . . .down. . ." repeated about seven times in an increasingly-loud voice, followed by grabbing the dog's collar and forcing the dog to the floor."That dog NEVER does what I tell her," you say. Oh yes, the dog does - probably precisely. Because what you have probably taught the dog is not to lie down when you say "Down!" but to lie down when you say "Down down down down down down down," and then pop the collar. The dog is doing EXACTLY what you trained her to do. Remember: we may think a dog should respond to the first command, but if we haven't enforced it or taught it properly, what the dog has been trained to do is to sit when you say "Sit sit sit sit sit." To your dog, THAT is the command.

Lots of folks think retrieving is great fun for dogs, and it is. It's also great fun for people. Playing tennis ball games with a dog is great. Throwing sticks in the water. Throwing frisbies. What a thrill. So you have a dog who loves to bring you things. . . .hmmmm, why not train it to bring in the newspaper, to bring you your slippers? Sure, why not. Only the first time you point to the newspaper and give your fetch command, the dog refuses - so you get angry. Or, let's say the dog DOES pick up the newspaper but tears it, and you get angry. Your dog doesn't know you're angry because the newspaper is torn and wet - the dog thinks you're angry because he brought you something. Now tell him to get his ball - ha! Not on your life. If you correct a dog for retrieving something because it's not what you wanted him to retrieve, he thinks it's the act, not the object, you're objecting to. So his natural instinct is to not do it the next time you ask. You can ruin a really good game of throw the stick this way! If you want him to find specific objects, then make it a find it game - and change your word. Dogs are smarter than most people think: they really can be taught the difference between ball, teddy bear, newspaper, shoe, stick, fetch, get it, find it, and so on.

Now this is the most important, because your dog's life could depend on it. It's the "come" or "here" command. Here's what happens: you have a puppy who joyously comes bounding to you every time you say "come," because puppies LOVE to come to you. Then your puppy reaches adolescence and one day you say come and he says no way. So you chase him down and pop him one. What's he going to do the next time he hears the word "come?" Run even faster! OR - every time you say "come," you lock him in the bathroom and leave for eight hours. OR - you say "come" and cut his toenails, cut mats from his coat, tell him he's a rotten dog for getting into the cat food. "Come" becomes the most negative word in the world. To reinforce "come," you have to use it randomly sometimes, just because, and you have to tell your dog what a great fellow he is for just coming to say hi and be with you. Again, vary your language. If you've worn out the good graces of "come," try "here."

When my friend and I reached our destination with our dogs that day (Dog Lake at the top of Millcreek Canyon, a delight!) we heard and saw the ultimate misuse of training and language. A hiker kept calling her dog by using only the dog's name, over and over. (Your dog's name is your dog's name; it is NOT a command.) The dog stayed somewhere far away. Finally the woman found her dog and started down the trail with her, LECTURING nonstop: "When I tell you to come to me, I expect you to come to me, and the next time I tell you to come to me, I expect you to come to me, and you're such a naughty girl, etc." This went on for fifteen minutes. The woman was not raising her voice, she was sing-songing. Either the dog was bored to tears or thought she was the best dog in the world to play hide and seek with a mistress who then praised her to the skies.

Moral of the story: Don't bore your dog and don't let your dog tune you out! And if you say it, mean it.

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